Ella Mills’ father, Ralph Mills, is committed to a challenging effort to break a world record to generate money for the Kevin Bell Trust, with the aim of saving other families from the overwhelming bureaucratic process his own family had to endure when repatriating Ella’s body. Ella, a 20-year-old Irish student from Clontarf, Dublin, drowned in a tragic kayaking accident in the United States two years prior.
Despite the fact that Ella was insured, and hence the family did not require the trust’s services, the bureaucratic process still caused substantial distress for the family, according to Mr. Mills. On Tuesday, during interviews on Newstalk Breakfast and RTÉ Radio’s Today with Claire Byrne Show, Mr. Mills delved into the details of Ella’s unfortunate demise in September 2023.
Ella had only recently embarked on her third year as a dual BA student with New York’s Columbia University and Trinity College Dublin, where she studied English. Upon her arrival at Columbia, Ella enthusiastically joined various clubs and societies, including the kayaking group that planned the trip on the deadly Potomac river.
While explaining that the river was not an appropriate choice for novices, he recalled the horrifying incident of his daughter being trapped by a turbulent underwater current at the base of a rock. Although the kayakers on the scene did their best to save her, Mr. Mills established that it was an insurmountable situation. Ella battled with the water, struggling for a tense two minutes before she succumbed to the overpowering river.
When discussing the challenges he faced following the passing of his daughter, Mr Mills explained: “At first glance, you would think it might be a simple matter for us. Her passing occurred in the governmental epicentre, [Washington DC]. She had ample insurance protection. We received considerable assistance from Columbia University and the Garda liaison officer stationed in Washington. His support was exceptional.
“However, the entire situation turned out to mirror a Kafkaesque nightmare. The bureaucratic hurdles. One can scarcely fathom the tribulations encountered by families suffering losses under more complicated circumstances. It’s truly distressing to ponder.
“The support [of the Kevin Bell Trust] turned out to be an invaluable source of information, even though we initially didn’t feel the need for it. We were frequently referred to them. They have years of experience, and their recommendations were very useful if we encountered difficulties.
“They’ve been easing the monetary load for those without insurance, which can be utterly devastating. They also handle the logistical issues of transporting a dear one home; their expertise is profound in this domain.”
Mr Mills raised funds for the trust by partaking in an aqua marathon – finishing a full marathon in a swimming pool. His completion of 844 laps of a Dublin pool set a new Guinness world record.
“You constantly run back and forth in a swimming pool of uniform depth. The total was 844 laps… This experience of trying to run through water is of symbolic significance. It resonates with the struggles one faces when bereaved. It also provided an angle for our fundraising campaign for the Kevin Bell Trust. A frequently repeated advice is to just keep moving forward.”
Mr Mills described a visualization that made the challenge more bearable; he envisaged that Ella was ahead of him, smoothing his path through the water.
The feat posed profound mental hurdles as well as physical ones. The attempt’s timing was an unplanned coincidence, falling on the anniversary of the day Ella was left in New York by her family, marking their final farewell.
“The decision simply occurred naturally, as I aimed to make the most of the summer holidays, setting out on the final weekend of August. That’s when I noticed the significance of the date,” commented Mr Mills, referring to his daughter, Ella Mills, after whom a Potomac River island was named, ensuring her everlasting remembrance, as stated at her funeral.
Mr Mills revealed Ella’s resolved aspiration of residing in New York, a place she briefly experienced during her childhood. Her commitment to this was unwavering, he explained. Her family thoroughly endorsed her dreams, believing confidently that one day, she would leave a remarkable impact on the world.
“Ella was tremendously special, exhibiting a remarkable aura that set her apart. She was arguably the brightest individual I have ever encountered. From an extremely young age, we recognised this,” Mr Mills reminisced. He further added that first children educate parents on parenthood, describing Ella’s contribution to their parenting journey as an utterly joyous lesson.