In an unexpected turn of events, newly appointed Taoiseach Simon Harris disappeared, causing a frantic search amongst Opposition members in Dáil Éireann. His evasion was distressing, sparking an investigation into his sudden absence 24 hours after taking office. His image was last captured around 1pm at Government Buildings, surrounded by experienced politicians Micheál Martin and Eamon Ryan, whose unfriendly smiles added to the growing concern. The worrying scene was further intensified by the presence of 16 members from the notorious Coalition Juniors gang forming a threatening ring around Harris.
Brand-new members Emer Higgins, Colm Burke and Alan Dillon appeared disoriented, likely due to their initiation into the gang earlier that day. Thomas Byrne, a seasoned member from the Coalition Juniors, seemed perturbed as he was thrust with additional responsibilities as none of the Fine Gael members wanted the Gaeltacht portfolio. Fellow member Niall Collins must have been equally perplexed, owing to the unexpected Cabinet promotion of his Fine Gael competitor, Patrick O’Donovan from Limerick.
After relocating indoors, the group vanished from sight. Consequently, Simon Harris was MIA for an extended period, leaving his chair unoccupied. Despite an adjusted start time for the day, Mary Lou McDonald, Opposition TD, prepared to face the newest challenge, but was taken aback by Harris’ empty seat.
Surprisingly, Harris finally emerged, showing up in a video where he casually greeted from Government Buildings, where it turned out he had been all this while.
The Taoiseach was nowhere to be found, causing an uproar in the Dáil. This shocking turn of events left everyone incredulous, opposition TDs included, who were left focusing on the empty chair that should have been filled by Simon Harris. Courageous yet visibly anxious, Mary Lou kept her composure knowing that she had crucial tasks to deal with.
By not showing up in the assembly on his initial day, Taoiseach Harris inadvertently gave Mary Lou, the Sinn Féin leader, and her Opposition counterparts a clear shot on goal. It was a golden opportunity that Mary Lou was not going to miss. After she seized the chance, other party members eagerly lined up to voice their discontent as well.
They had all been so inspired by the Taoiseach’s motivating speech just a day prior, mapping out his immediate plans to take action and lead the country. During the recent forum, the Dáil recalled his words: “Let’s get to work.” To which Mary Lou responded with readiness and asked, where was the absent Taoiseach?
Discouragement filled the Dáil, with claims of this event being a downright disgrace and completely unacceptable by both Mary Lou and Labour leader Ivana Bacik. Prior to this day, a to-do list was marking the agenda for Wednesday; however, now TDs were left in confusion with a conjured up timetable for the remaining week.
The Independent TD, Thomas Pringle, and Social Democrat Catherine Murphy also expressed their disapproval. The latter questioned the point of having a Dáil Business Committee when the Government, with its majority, simply bypasses members’ decisions and enforces its will onto the House.
Along these lines, Mattie McGrath deemed the situation a mockery and referred to “GUBU territory.” Pointing at the empty chair, he declared it an utter chaos. He was eager to know the whereabouts of the Tánaiste who usually steps in for the Taoiseach, as well as the Green leader’s location.
Government Chief Whip Hildegarde Naughton tried to explain the situation but only managed to disclose that Simon Harris had four crucial phone calls to attend to.
In her statement, she mentioned her constant efforts to assist her counterparts from the opposing section of the House while organising matters. Yet, today, the Taoiseach was absent, reflecting poorly on his first day in office. A headcount was performed, resulting in a government victory. The Tánaiste, Micheál Martin, made sure to cast his vote, as did Eamon Ryan, the Green Party chief, and Leo Varadkar who previously held Houdini Harris’s position.
Despite his change of role, Varadkar seemed to relish his time on the backbenches, not least because it helped him avoid wearing a tie. Mattie’s dissatisfaction did not diminish, however. He made a caustic remark about creating a wax replica of the absent leader and placing it in his vacant chair. Mary Lou expressed her concerns about the Taoiseach’s absence more directly, demanding transparency.
The opposition TDs, aware of their impending abandoned schedules, were determined not to stand idly by. The shock of the situation seemed to hit them all at once, to which they were no stranger. Deputy McDonald struggled to comprehend why the newly appointed Taoiseach was preoccupied with personal calls during the time set aside for Leaders’ Questions.
So upset was Mary Lou that she immediately expressed her outrage in a video, decrying this intolerable behaviour, especially from a leader who had pledged to forge ahead the previous day. She pointed out the Taoiseach’s absence during her day at the Dáil. However, it was revealed he wasn’t absent but simply not at the national parliament. His team later released a video giving the public a glimpse into his first day on the job, which included government meetings, ministry appointments, and conversations with other political leaders, including the British Prime Minister and the Ukrainian president.
There’s no need for concern. Hildegarde has assured us that Taoiseach Harris will attend his initial Leaders’ Questions session next Tuesday. However, it would have been ideal to permit the opposition TDs the opportunity to voice their concerns in the chamber. For the time being, they haven’t witnessed anything quite like it.