Air Steward Critiques Allsopp’s Parenting Style

One observation that I have made while serving for a decade as a flight attendant for a global airline is the stark contrast in parenting styles between those in economy and first class.

It appears that once parents get the taste of first class luxury, they are quick to delegate their child care responsibilities. To be fair, who wouldn’t appreciate a mini break from the mundane task of babysitting kids during the summer break?

However, it’s shocking to see that some parents have no hesitation in instructing others to care for their children. There have been instances when young ones from first class have quietly slipped into the economy section for an impromptu “daycare experience”. And when you return the children to their parents, they accept them back in the same manner as they would receive their baggage from the storage compartments – with not so much as a ‘thank you’ for caring for their dearly loved offspring.

This reminded me of a recent incident involving TV host Kirstie Allsopp, who found herself under scrutiny when she proudly shared on social media that she had permitted her son, aged 15 at the time, to go on an inter-railing trip across Europe for nine days in the company of a 16-year-old friend.

(It’s noteworthy to mention that Allsopp previously sparked controversy among the younger generation facing housing difficulties when she suggested they could afford homes if they cut out expenses such as Netflix subscriptions and bought sandwiches for work instead.)

Allsopp was thoroughly incensed when an individual, perhaps a green-eyed lodger, had the audacity to inform social services regarding a statement she made on Platform X on a Monday. Upon investigation, social services asked about the precautions she took to ensure her underage son’s well-being during his European tour. He has turned 16 since. Her response was, “To ensure his safety, my husband, Ben, and I made sure he had all crucial numbers on his mobile phone, full travel insurance, and one of my credit cards – strictly for emergencies.”

In my youth, to survive the summer, we had to craft this tall tale about spending a night at a mate’s place, which would usually end up with us passed out in some field after demolishing a six-pack of Blue WKD. Imagine being given a ticket for inter-rail along with a credit card meant for “emergency use only” and then hopping your way through Europe at the age of 15? It would be a series of mini crises at every pub from our doorstep to Berlin.

As much as I rib my Irish mother for being stereotypical, she would have never allowed me to fly solo at 15. I vividly recall the summer when I had to board a train for my visit to the Gaeltacht in Galway, all by myself. My mum dropped me off at the station then walked up to a young woman, utterly random and said “Hello, this is Paula. She is also headed to Galway. Would you mind keeping an eye on her during the journey?” My young self was mortified at the time, but now that memory brings a domestic warmth.

Public reaction to Allsopp was diverse. There were those, who used the incident to reflect upon their own past, arguing that their rebellious actions did them no harm. Some would claim, “When I was 14, I took a sneaky trip to Amsterdam in the 70s”; “When I was 17, I travelled to Australia by myself and came out unscathed.” Allsopp herself digressed more than once in the ensuing discourse, expressing a hope that, “the uproar had a silver lining in kickstarting the debate on how best we can assist teenagers in maturing into confident, proficient adults as well as the matter of accurate and pragmatic perception of risk.”

The reaction to Allsopp’s decision has provoked a wide spectrum of responses. Some are shocked at what they perceive to be her irresponsible behaviour, including the undisclosed individual who alerted the authorities. Allsopp took to Instagram to explain that she found his journey evoking admiration and was taken aback when she received a call from child services – an unexpected event that left her and Oscar stunned.

There are others who find themselves managing the fallout – those responsible for safeguarding the so-called ‘lone-travelling children’. Drawing from my experience of overseeing these children on flights for ten years, I can assure you that even in Allsopp’s absence, there are numerous attentive adults who notice these solo child travellers and offer them support.

It is fortunate for her that there is generally a community prepared to share the responsibility. Whenever I become aware of a minor travelling solo on my flight, I embrace the responsibility of ensuring their safety throughout the journey. I have even seen them through customs, and following an age-old Irish habit, handed over the child to the next trustworthy adult available.

A young boy travelling alone stirs my protective instinct, reminding me of my own adolescence when I used to travel to Galway. However, it’s concerning that not all adults would view a 15-year-old boy travelling alone with the same protective instinct, this behaviour from Allsopp is what concerns me the most.

While youthful recklessness is rather usual, it is rarely endorsed by parents. In the numerous reactions to Allsopp’s actions online, I failed to find a single parent who would willingly allow their underage teenager to travel alone across Europe.

Paula Gahan, an Irish native based in London, provides her first-hand perspective on this issue as an international airline crew member and host of The Bad Air Hostess podcast available on both Apple and Spotify.

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